ROACHQUEST (SUGGESTIONS)

>Press the imaginary light switch.

>Press the imaginary light switch.

ABSOLUTELY NOTHING HAPPENS.

NOW YOU ARE DEFINITELY PISSING YOURSELF. SO AFRAID OF THE DARK AREN'T YOU.

>Roach. Get up off the ground. Open your eyes. Walk with your hands in front of you, and trust.

>Conjure a magic, mysterious, anti-darkness, scotophobia-proof light-emanating flashlight

>keep trying to conjure the cashews. eat as many cashews as possible. the cashews will fix you. and maybe the cashew crumbs will draw some roaches towards you

>Roach. Get up off the ground. Open your eyes. Walk with your hands in front of you, and trust.

YES. WAKE UP.

UNTIL I SEE YOU AGAIN.

> Examine the current state of your body

ROACH: Examine the current state of your body

I navigate my ROTULIQUAD's STATI card to examine my HUMOR fluids.

My BLOOD has drained a little, but other than that, nothing to worry about. It's also perfectly red. BLOOD is stored in the flask in LIQUID form.

My PHLASM is below half, which is not too bad. PHLASM is stored in GOO form.

My KA is beginning to rise, slowly. That flask has never contained anything... until now. I'm not sure what it means. I've just discovered that KA is stored in GAS form.

Drink some of your own BLOOD

ROACH: Drink some of your own BLOOD

I look down and check my hand. The wound is sealed. There is no other opening for me to access my BLOOD.

[Lax] PRIMORDIAL MAN: That idea sounds truly revolutionary. You will attempt this in the future.

> Examine surroundings

ROACH: Examine surroundings

Examining the concave surface of the shrine right in front of me reveals a minor stain of BLOOD within. I know it's mine. The blade that was used for this bloodletting appears to be clean, though not shiny anymore. What happened while I... blacked out?

To the south, or rather, behind me, is nothing immediate. It is the way back to the ROACH FARM.

North, I spot something. I'm surprised I haven't seen it before. I'm not quite sure what it is.

> ROACH examine weird gizmo sticking out of the ground north of you

ROACH: examine weird gizmo sticking out of the ground north of you

What is this. I acknowledge the symbols, it's...

[Lax] POIESITUDE: Of course you do. These letters are from the alphabet of the COMMON LANGUAGE. The language you're using to form all your thoughts right now!

But this machine is completely foreign to me. I've never seen anything like it. What does it do?

> ROACH: Press the Control button to take control of this machine.

> Roach: Depress the "Greater Than Symbol" to signify to the strange machine that you have proven yourself "Greater Than" all past challenges, and will continue to in the future.

Roach: Depress the "Greater Than Symbol" to signify to the strange machine that you have proven yourself "Greater Than" all past challenges, and will continue to in the future.

I depress the symbol on the strange machine repeatedly, with my index finger. Nothing occurs.

[Trivial] PRIMORDIAL MAN: Good stuff. Demonstrate to this useless device who's the alpha. Press down. Harder.

ROACH: Press the Control button to take control of this machine.

I repeat the same maneuver on 'CONTROL'...

[Temperate] POIESITUDE: How can you possibly gain control of the contraption in front of you? This calls for some special assistance...

Your attempt to MANIPULATE THE WEIRD MACHINE brings forth an increase to your DIGITONOMY, up to level SIX(math3)

> ROACH: With your index finger, push the happy face button just enough for the mechanism to become depressed, without it's mood sharing the same fate.

> Roach: Got to fruityrumpus.com