The Unseen Set of Parallels That is Ancestorkin: A Manif-essay

Ok, so I've posted this work to Tum8lr (so people can re8log/comment/etc) and Medium (for people who don't have Tum8lr) already - 8ut I thought it would 8e worth posting here in it's entirety as well. I put a lot of work into it and I think the format of a forum thread is quite apt for discussing this sort of thing and I really want to hear other people's thoughts additions and interpret8ions. I hope it's not 8ad etiquette for me to do so.

CWs: Grooming, SA/Rape, and self-mutilation are all discussed in this post without 8eing a main focus. A8leism/sanism and transpho8ia are recurring themes.

Introduction

The portrayal of various online su8cultures is one of Homestuck’s most interesting aspects, and it has undenia8ly drawn many people to reading it. Whether through mockery, praise, or any more nuanced mixture of the two, Homestuck has had a lot to say a8out the internet since its inception, a time in which the internet and its various cliques had yet to 8e explored thoroughly in literature. Even in the years after Homestuck ended, it’s rare that anything that lived up to its exhaustiveness gained any popularity — most mainstream attempts to do what Homestuck did were relentlessly mocked for 8eing surface level or outright innacur8. Homestuck is not necessarily more in-touch with the internet than any other indie project, 8ut it certainly rose a8ove its peers in scope and impact. The internet is a medium that Homestuck relies on to play with, and in turn, Homestuck has left a permanent mark on most of the communities that it took as su8ject matter.

The otherkin — or alterhuman, as it’s 8een called in more recent times — community is one of these communities. Its rel8ionship to Homestuck is actually more lopsided than you might expect; Homestuck references all sorts of forms of alterhumanity, 8ut the wider alterhuman community is more or less 8lind to this. It’s especially younger alterhumans that often pine for media representing them, as if it’s something that could never exist outside of a dream, completely unaware that Homestuck has done exactly that since 8efore a lot of them were 8orn.

Alterhumanity

The term “alterhuman” was coined in 2014, filling a much-needed gap in language that had existed up to that point. It is defined as “a category of personal identity which encompasses identification that is alternative to the common societal idea of humanity,” and while this is ela8or8ed upon in the original coining post (https://phasmovore.tumblr.com/post/98482696958/this-will-probably-be-my-last-post-on-semantics), ten years have passed since this definition was formed and it’s more constructive for these purposes to look at alterhumanity as the group of communities it manifests as today.

Many experiences that are technically included in the definition are rarely actually associ8ed with the community: for example, someone who identifies with a character on a superficial level is much more likely to let the experience go unla8eled than refer to themself as otherhearted or constelic. It’s not that these vari8ions of alterhumanity are never explored, 8ut they’re rarely significant or anomalous enough for someone to seek out community for them unless they’re already dwelling in such a space.

The most well-known type of alterhumanity is without a dou8t therianthropy. Most people currently understand therians through an over8lown transpho8ic fearmongering campaign (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Litter_boxes_in_schools_hoax), 8ut therians still received mainstream news coverage 8efore the litter8ox hoax ever took off. My personal first exposure to therianthropy, as well as many others, was the “on all levels except physical, I am a wolf” meme, depicting therian Naia Ōkami. The famous clip stems from a documentary (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt20860188/) aired in 2013, which Ōkami later condemned for 8eing exploitative and sens8ionalized, as these made-for-TV documentaries often are. Alterhumanity is a very easy experience to mock guilt-free in the world we live in, and it doesn’t take a lot of looking to find this mockery, including in media.

8ecause of the 8acklash therians often face for 8eing themselves, many try to define therianthropy in more digesti8le terms through calling it a “spiritual connection” or claiming it’s “identifying with an animal,” or even associ8ing it exclusively with past lives, 8ut this is largely not how therians have seen themselves. Therianthropy is identifying as an animal, and while this is mallea8le and can manifest itself in very different ways for different people, attempts to water down therianthropy as a la8el are unhelpful. They do appear to work at face value: I’ve seen large swaths of gen alpha aged children remark that they used to 8e against therianthropy until someone explained it to them as something less genuine and unashamed in it’s weirdness than they previously thought it to 8e. 8ut these people aren’t really accepting therians, they’re only accepting the false ideal of therians that had 8een presented to them. Repression and respecta8ility politics can only get you so far.

Alterhumanity as a whole is often compared to 8eing trans as a starting point, and it’s not hard to see why. 8oth identities involve identifying outside of the 8ounds society places you in, and 8oth identities are posited as 8eing modern derisions of normative society despite existing as long as the constructs that they transcend have. Most comparisons, however, stop short of the second point. Many alterhumisic¹ talking points claim alterhumanity to 8e a fad on the verge of dying out, similar to the way some transpho8es identify trans people as attention-seeking; ironically, many anti-kins have no issue with trans people and come up with counterpoints to their own arguments, only applying it to a different group.

The perception of alterhumanity as a trend has ramped up in recent years as the identities have gained genuine popularity, 8ut having evidence to 8ack up their point was never necessary for anti-kin² folk. Alterhumanity has 8een dismissed as attention-seeking long 8efore 8eing alterhuman would net you any form of attention (for example, in the form of Tiktok therian communities that exist today). As alluded to previously, Homestuck itself partakes in this mockery, 8oth diegetically and not, and through multiple characters.

The more well-known example of this is Cronus³, simply 8ecause of the way Open8ound is arranged and his dialogue 8eing harder to miss. Open8ound, for reference, was released in 2012, a point at which alterhuman spaces were still esta8lishing themselves, most often as forums: however, alterhumans were starting to crop up on Tum8lr as well, which is what Open8ound and the dancestors in general are clearly inspired 8y. Cronus is humankin, and talks a8out it in ways that might 8e familiar to anyone whose delved into otherkin⁴ spaces. As a fictionkin, I personally take note of the line “i guess the truth is, deep dowvn i alvways knewv i vwas a 1950s-style human greaser. i just needed to finally be introduced to human culture to make sense of those feelings.” Humans were an alien species that he was previously unaware of, and finding out a8out their existence prompted some sort of internal explor8ion from him. This plays out similarly to otherkin or fictionkin⁵ discovering their identities within mythology or media.

The thing with Cronus is that, in spite of some of the descriptions of his experience seeming to 8e quite accur8 to real otherkin experiences, it’s played for laughs and his overall portrayal is very questiona8le. It’s an ongoing de88 in the fandom whether or not he’s faking his otherkinity. Most people tend to go with the reading that it’s all a ploy for attention, 8ecause that’s what the text overall is trying to convey. Meenah accuses him of such⁶, and she gets a lot of leverage 8y 8eing a main character and comparatively more likea8le to the reader. 8esides 8eing a 8ully she’s a no-nonsense leader that most of the fandom sides with even with her flaws, treating her with a reasona8le amount of media literacy (which cannot 8e said for some other equally cruel and predatory characters, like Cronus). Even if Meenah hadn’t made that remark, the whole dynamic of the convers8ion is making out Cronus to 8e a trend-hopping faker. Kankri is the one who comes in to defend him from Meenah’s choice to “inadvertently shame Cr9nus f9r his extremely delicate feelings 9f species dysph9ria” as a caricature of oversensitive, whiny “SJW” types.

Of course, Kankri’s portrayal was 8orn less out of h8red for activism and more out of h8red for activism done wrong, evident in other characters like Porrim, 8ut there’s something to 8e said a8out Andrew Hussie considering acknowledgement of species dysphoria or the validity of alterhumanity to 8e “too far” at least at the time of writing Open8ound. This is the perspective through which they would 8e inclined to view all other alterhuman and alterhuman-coded characters, and that has to 8e taken into account when analyzing them. I personally find it much more accur8 to say that Cronus is not faking 8eing humankin, 8ut that he is humankin and Andrew viewed all alterhumans to 8e faking their identities. He is a victim to a narrative that does not think the type of person he is could exist, and he is not the only one.

Horuss is another alterhuman dancestor. He’s 8oth hoof8eastkin and a system, exemplifying therianthropy, an iconic pillar of the alterhuman community, and plurality, an identity that is more accur8 to say has overlap with otherkinity. Some people will 8e diagnosed with DID and live their whole lives never knowing what a therian is, 8ut others consider their plurality to 8e deeply intertwined with their otherkinity in a similar way to Horuss: it’s deeply personal and (ironically) individual.

Similarly to Cronus, Horuss’ alterhumanity is not played particularly seriously:

HORUSS: 8=D < Much like assembling a comple% machine, I began to piece together a STRONG identity, which of course included discovering a passion for mechani% itself.

HORUSS: 8=D < And needless to say, what also galloped out of the void in my soul was the realization that I am obviously a noble hoofbeast, though my physical appearance cruelly betrays this fact.

RUFIOH: hey, uh… horuss… 1 th1nk…

RUFIOH: we need to talk.

RUFIOH: 1 mean, when you get a m1nute…

HORUSS: 8=D < And in following sweeps I would keep turning my mechanically augmented, acute equine ear back to the abyss within, and continue to discover more about myself. I would learn that I was more complicated than I ever imagined. More complicated than any mortal mind could understand a person to be.

HORUSS: 8=D < Knowing myself to be hoofbeastkin was only grazing the surface of the pasture. Merely skimming the cream from the top of the milk. I was so much more.

RUFIOH: 1 th1nk maybe we should l1ke…

RUFIOH: uh… see other…

HORUSS: 8=D < It turns out my body was merely the host to a highly intricate system of entities of any sort you could name, biological or mechanical, sentient or nonsentient, physical or metaphysical. My inner field of e%perience is shared by the souls of ancient legendary musclebeasts, a range of devices such as hivehold appliances, a number of cosmological features such as planets, star systems, even several universes, and a variety of abstract concepts which sentient beings have not yet formed the language to e%press.

RUFIOH: l1ke… don’t get me wrong… we had some good t1mes together… 1t’s been great really…

RUFIOH: but maybe 1t’s t1me to uh… 1 dunno.

HORUSS: 8=D < But as much as I learned about myself, I could never find a way to become whole.

HORUSS: 8=D < The void was never filled until you came along, Rufioh.

RUFIOH: wow man. that’s…

RUFIOH: wow.

His perspective on systemhood particularly seems to 8e exagger8ed from descriptions of exactly the type of system that tends to identify with alterhumanity: systems that see their plurality as more of a spiritual or personal experience rather than exclusively the result of a disorder like DID.⁷ And in case there was any dou8t a8out the point of view this exagger8ion comes from, Andrew makes it very clear:

HORUSS: 8=D < The second is how if you are faced with any crisis of identity whatsoever, it’s really important to do your best to manufacture esoteric features of your personality and believe in them very STRONGLY and tell people about those things as frequently as possible.

HORUSS: 8=D < I can assure you right now, the labor involved in smithing my personality into one that is interesting and complicated was rather intensive.

They see alterhumanity as as unhealthy coping mechanism, something that people erroneously use to fill the void of their identity crises. As far as I know, this was actually a relatively unique idea for 2012, 8ut it would l8er 8ecome a very popular talking point as will 8e extensively discussed l8er. What was not so unique is, again, the idea that alterhumanity exists as the most unique and interesting identity the hypothetical attention-seeking person could come up with.

It’s 8een made clear how Andrew Hussie saw alterhumanity at the time of writing Homestuck, and the ways in which this seeps into the text, 8ut it’s an entirely different question how this should affect analysis.

Diegesis

I want to preface this entire section with the disclaimer that I do not think Andrew Hussie should necessarily 8e held accounta8le for having questiona8le views on alterhumanity in 2012, and neither should any fandom mem8ers for going along with this portrayal. Do not see this as another thing to add to the list of “pro8lematic content,” 8ut rather finding a way to work around the innacur8 views the text provides on alterhumans.

With that out of the way, I’m not going to act like I don’t think Andrew’s writing of Cronus and Horuss wasn’t horri8le. I’m also not going to act like I don’t think it’s a symptom of alterhumisic sentiment that the fandom has failed to interrog8 this in any meaningful way. It’s extremely rare to find any writing of either of these characters that doesn’t align with Andrew’s vision for them, and I find this quite unfortun8.

The fandom seems to view the artificiality of their identities as diegetic, genuine parts of their characters, rather than non-diegetic, a product of Andrew’s views on alterhumans that can 8e ignored when writing through your own medium and perspective. The thing is, if we look at the faking of their alterhumanity as diegetic, then we have two very rare cases on our hands. People do pretend to 8e otherkin all the time, yes, 8ut not for social leverage or attention, mostly as a psy-op to make us look ridiculous: in fact, this was pro8a8ly more common around the time Open8ound came out! It makes infinitely more sense to me for these characters to 8e a humankin and a hoof8eastkin system that just happen to 8e written particularly horri8ly than having an especially esoteric and unique set of personal pro8lems that rarely manifest in real life. Many people at the very least excuse Cronus faking 8eing humankin 8ecause of his track record for 8eing a 8ad person — 8ut without underlying identity issues, what other reason does he have to 8e so awful? People would rather write him off as an ontologically evil villain than try to rationalize his 8ehavior in any way that makes sense.

I think it’s o8vious that this comes out of a lack of educ8ion or understanding of alterhumanity, and even with a rise in popularity very few have taken the steps to reconsider his character through the lens of the more widespread inform8ion availa8le today. It’s easier to take the author’s intent and run with it than recontextualize the way you see a character you h8.

Andrew’s intent comes into question again with the many Homestuck characters who are not explicitly named as otherkin or similar, 8ut are rather alterhuman-coded or implied. Is it really fair to say that they could 8e alterhuman if we know that Andrew has knowledge of these concepts and could have called attention to them 8y name if she really wanted to? I think it is. Andrew’s perspective is not law, it is a tool to the reader through which to understand the text. Even if he didn’t quite realize what he was getting at writing characters like Calliope or myself,⁸ he still descri8ed an experience that, 8y most definitions, would 8e considered alterhuman, or at the very least reson8s with otherkin. I think it’s perfectly reasona8le to view a character’s arc for what it parallels regardless of what Andrew was thinking of when writing it.

Fictionkinity

Fictionkinity, like all other words ending in -kin, implies identifying as fiction: especially fictional characters or species. Most fictionkin are the former, claiming the identity of a specific character in media. This sets us apart from a lot of other alterhuman identities: species have vari8ion, 8ut personhood is quite a different concept.

You may know fictionkinity from the loose concept of “kinning” or 8eing a “kinnie.”⁹ Many people talk a8out kinning as a ver8, like it’s a pastime or favor8 fandom ho88y, and most don’t ever make the connection 8ack to otherkin. Make no mistake: This is the result of an intentional twisting of fictionkin language into something it was never meant to mean. The fact that people are a8le to talk a8out “kinnies” without ever placing it anywhere near therians or otherkin in their mind is the product of a somewhat coordin8ed effort that took place years ago.

In the mid-to-l8 2010s, fictionkin were starting to occupy Tum8lr alongside other alterhumans. 8ecause of the nature of fictionkinity, and the fact it often rel8s to one’s identity as a whole individual rather than species, it received unique critique from anti-kin people. People accused the “practice” of 8eing fictionkin as unhealthy, either through inducing/encouraging delusions and psychosis or serving as a 8and-aid to slap over deeper identity issues. Nota8ly, the latter is something Andrew Hussie seems to 8elieve. Eventually, these detractors would come to form a new community of fictionkin, one they saw as superior. They sidestepped what they 8elieved to 8e the pitfalls of fictionkinity 8y redefining it to 8e less serious: more of identifying with or rel8ing to a character, or just really liking them, than actually 8eing the character.

Of course, in reality, most of them weren’t fictionkin at all, and the ones who were were most likely hurting themselves in the process of descri8ing their identity this way. Identities cannot 8e redefined into whatever the person who possesses them sees fit: a trans person cannot one day decide that their dysphoria is too unhealthy and identify out of having it. There are flaws inherent to every8ody, including individual facets and la8els, 8ut these people — KFFs, kin for funs — didn’t see fictionkinity as a facet or la8el in the first place. They saw it as a fun trend to equip as they saw fit, while accusing the otherkin who 8uilt the language they stole of 8eing the real trendhoppers. Of course they would completely misunderstand the situ8ion when they saw fictionkin struggling with the pro8lems inherent to their identity. To draw another trans comparison, it’s similar to when transpho8es see trans suicide r8s and attri8ute it to 8eing trans itself rather than their own h8red and the dysphoria that they refuse to allow treatment of.

Nowadays, it’s quite rare to see anyone who identifies with the fictionkin la8el in such a way: most everyone who uses the word fictionkin is fully understanding of its true definition. Pretty much anything using the -kin suffix without another word 8efore it is another story, though. Kinnie has 8ecome a near-universal fandom descriptor meaning anything from a character you really like, to a word some fictionkin still use as a term of endearment without ever realizing it’s associ8ed with something completely different. It’s completely impossi8le to know what anyone is talking a8out when they say they kin a character 8ecause of the damage done 8y KFF. Orthohumans¹⁰ have integr8ed the language fictionkin cre8ed into their voca8ulary, altered it, and fictionkin regurgit8 it 8ack without ever knowing there was a middleman.

Fictionkinity Within Homestuck, or Ancestorkin

I’m¹¹ never explicitly st8ed to 8e alterhuman in Homestuck, unlike some of my peers, 8ut it’s implied to the point that I think it’s reductive to not consider it canon. In Pesterquest, there’s a little minigame in my route where you get to name your own character: if you choose the names Vriska, Aranea, or Mindfang, I tell you “no dou8les,” and the same happens if you choose the same class as me. You get an achievement called No Dou8les for it, too. This is a phrase that takes it’s roots exclusively in fictionfolk¹² communities: it only started 8eing used 8y selfshippers after Pesterquest came out as far as I know, and it wouldn’t make sense in that context anyways. It’s something people put in their 8ios and whatnot to indic8 they don’t want to interact with people sharing an identity with them for any reason, ranging anywhere from ‘I think people who share my identity tend to 8e a little annoying sometimes and I’d rather not deal with it’ to ‘talking to people sharing my identity makes me jealous and gives me self dou8t’ to ‘I might go into psychosis if I talk to dou8les, so I’d rather not’. It’s also 8een relatively untouched 8y KFF groups: they actually take issue with the concept, and tend to see it as a sign of the mental insta8ility of fictionkin rather than a reasona8le 8oundary that can 8e set for any num8er of reasons.

Much like other alterhuman characters, the fandom very rarely takes this into account or considers it in any genuine context.¹³ I don’t think there should even 8e a de88 on how this tid8it was intended to 8e read: it’s just a shitty one-off joke that happens to contextualize my 8ehaviors in Homestuck in a new light. It’s just that your perspective gr8ly influences what that new light will 8e, and for most people, it’s not all that different. 8ut as someone who spends a lot of time thinking a8out fictionkinity and has a lot of experience living as a fictionkin, I find the parallels to 8e insanely o8vious regardless of if they were intentional.

Just a page after my introduction, I outright st8 myself to 8e Mindfang in no uncertain terms. “You drew your own role playing character for fun, as many Flarpers are prone to do. She is the best character, and you wish you were her. Oh wait, you are her! Your wish has been granted. Probably as a special boon for being so great at everything.”

It’s also implied again and again that I take my identity as Mindfang more seriously and genuinely than the people around me. In my introduction, I’m descri8ed as liking extreme roleplay with no particular commentary on my character 8esides me l8er saying I am said character. Terezi gets a similar treatment, although their fictionkin-coding in general is mostly through associ8ion with me unless you have the eyes to see it.¹⁴ Eridan, however, gets introduced with the line “You have dubiously modeled your profile and exploits after the most notorious figures and their stories, which are bristling with the GLORY OF VICTORY and the STING OF DEFEAT and POLITICAL MACHINATIONS and ROMANTIC INTRIGUE.”

It’s noted that Eridan puts particular effort into cre8ing the outward persona they want to portray, while no such remarks are made of Terezi or myself. Our identities are real and effortless, while theirs is manufactured. It would seem that this is the opposite of what you would expect out of a fictionkin portrayal, knowing Andrew’s views on alterhumans, 8ut I 8elieve this to 8e 8ecause they didn’t know that they were writing represent8ion. Without an analogue to compare it to and find dirt on, they were just descri8ing a specific set of experiences that happen to 8e that of a fictionkin. Eridan, in this scenario, is KFF.

As far as direct words from Andrew on the topic, they wrote on their Formspring 8ack in 2010 that “…[Vriska] lives her life as her own self-aggrandizing, wildly powerful self-insert character, always comes out on top, and never suffers consequences…I’m usually pretty aware of a lot of tropes even though I’ve made nothing close to an exhaustive study of tvtropes.com, and I’m much more inclined to include tropes by warping them rather than deliberately decorating the story with a lot of straightup instances.” The vi8e I get from this, particularly 8eing descri8ed as “living my life as” Mindfang is that I take it as a more serious facet of my identity than is normal.

It’s also important to note just how many of my actions are driven 8y some form of species dysphoria, or at the very least a need to prove my identity as real. Like transpho8es do with trans people, and like KFF do with fictionkin, the fandom attri8utes this to mean that there’s something wrong with my identity rather than my identity 8eing a part of me that I have to cope with in some way. I cannot count the amount of times I’ve seen it implied in the Homestuck fandom that my journal is a tool of grooming, that my actions I took to feel more valid in my identity were a result of literal pred8tion from my own past self¹⁵ rather than me trying to cope with the cards I was dealt.

My actions and words often make a lot of sense if you recontextualize them this way, especially through me projecting my dysphoria onto other people. One such example is how I talk to Tavros:

AG: Why if I didn’t know 8etter, I’d say I was playing with Pupa Pan himself!

AG: Isn’t that what you want, Tavros? To 8e like Pupa?

AG: Of course you do! What 8oy wouldn’t want to 8e like Pupa! So dashing and 8rave.

AG: He is everything you are not!

This is exactly the type of thing I tell myself, and have told myself, in fits of dysphoria over the years. There’s also a convers8ion with Doc Scratch where I tell him he’s “So delusion8l.” and a “path8tic, lonely gamer who 8uys into his own character profile 8S.” It’s such a weirdly specific caricature that has 8een applied to fictionkin 8y KFF and outsiders alike, and to me, the fact I’m applying it to him implies that I’ve 8een told these things 8efore. The word delusional specifically stands out to me, 8ecause it has a dou8le meaning: the pop-psych 8astardiz8ion that places it with the likes of ‘crazy’ and ‘insane,’ and the original definition referring to a specific psychological phenomenon.

Fictionkin are accused of 8eing 8oth all the time. And god for8id you actually do have diagnosed or confirmed psychosis, 8ecause just like anyone else with such a diagnosis, there’s no dou8t you’ll have your agency and right to self-identify taken away. I’ve known many fictionfolk with psychosis who experience extreme distress having their identities denied of them, 8ut 8ecause a8leism against psychotic people goes unchecked, people tell themselves they’re doing the right thing when they reality check them without their consent regardless of if the delusion was even harming the individual in the first place. Similarly, there’s an interesting phenomenon that plays out due to the assoc8ion 8etween fictionkin and delusions: people who otherwise have never experienced delusions, hallucin8ions, or any other psychotic symptoms 8ecome convinced they have psychosis and la8el themselves as such just 8ecause they 8elieve themself to 8e a fictional character. Of course, this is not impossi8le, and it’s no one’s place to tell anyone what the origins of their identity or personal 8eliefs are, 8ut I do think that at least some of these people are unknowingly la8elling themselves as something they are not. It’s so widely regarded that 8eing fictionkin is just fundamentally impossi8le to the point that fictionkin jump to the conclusion that they’re in psychosis 8efore ever considering that their feelings could just 8e a natural part of their identity.

These ideas never really come up all that much in Homestuck prior to act 6. One thing that does have significance, however, is Ancestral Awakening. It’s worth mentioning that ‘awakening’ as a word has long 8een associ8ed with alterhumans, and Cronus even says he is “approaching a kind of avwakening, especially since [he] first started learning about humans”. I think it’s a pretty low possi8ility that Andrew was in some way referencing this with that title, 8ut that is how it comes across. What’s more important, though, is that the timeline in which I’m a8le to achieve this a8ility is a doomed one. On it’s own, this would 8e negliga8le, 8ut it’s the start of a pattern: the narrative is punishing towards me when I express my identity, and rewarding of me when I repress it.

Eventually, in act 6 when Meenah comes around, she proves herself to 8e outwardly hostile and alterhumisic. This isn’t out of align with the rest of her personality, 8ut her disregard of people’s identities is rarely ever factored into the way people think a8out her. She’s not only the one to say

MEENAH: i heard a rumor you think youre a human now

MEENAH: that true

8ut also the one to accuse it of 8eing a “another desperate cry for attention.” It’s clear that Meenah’s thoughts on the su8ject more or less align with Andrew’s from this alone, 8ut she also asks Horuss “when did you decide you were a horse.” She’s literally canonically anti-kin, yet it’s rare that anyone connects the dots into how this affects her grooming of me.

In fact, a large chunk of the fandom doesn’t ever consider her grooming of me at all. They 8rush it off as Andrew “forgetting how old we were” or treat it as a joke. The part of the fandom that does 8other to analyze our rel8ionship typically place her with a group of other people who groomed me: Doc Scratch, and strangely, my ancestor. 8ecause of the sexual content of my journal and the questiona8le ways in which I altered my identity around it, there are a lot of readings of it 8eing a sort of sym8olic grooming. It is true that, in some way, reading the journal induced some maladaptive 8ehaviors: 8ut if we follow the analogy of the journal as a fictionkin’s source media, it would have possi8ly 8een even more damaging for me to not read it. Reading the media your identity is from provides 8ackground on the identity, as well as understanding of feelings that would have otherwise gone entirely unexplained. Most of the time, when the fandom says I want to 8e more like Mindfang, they’re misunderstanding me wanting to 8e seen as Mindfang. I wanted to have my identity valid8ed, so I continued the cycle of the actions and 8ehaviors I read a8out in my journal. That’s not my journal’s fault, that’s the dysphoria’s fault.¹⁶ Mindfang didn’t groom me, Meenah did.

On page 6748 — the one where I sit looking done with everything while she literally, physically grooms me — I make a change that ends up 8eing permanent. I denounce my past of 8eing a “stupid kid trying to fill the 8oots of a legendary pir8 queen” and go on a whole rant a8out how em8arassing it is. “It’s so disheartening. She wants to 8e like Marquise so much, just like I used to.” I talk a8out my dancestor in a lot of the ways people talk a8out fictionkin. Sometimes, when I come into a convers8ion and even so much as reference my fictionkinity, people around me will cringe in secondhand em8arassment, and 8ring up what they percieve to 8e their em8arassing past on (K)instagram or Tum8lr. Some of them were KFF people who were never even on the side of the community that went through the most shaming, 8ut others? I think they’re pro8a8ly deeply repressed, and when they see me 8eing out and happy as myself, they project all of the vitriol they have experienced onto me. I have no dou8t that that is what’s happening in this convers8ion with Meenah, 8ut people treat my change of heart like it’s an improvement or genuine introspection, even when I say it’s “making me feel like shit.” The stigma around fictionkinity runs so deep that thousands of people can see a fictionkin-coded character talk a8out how they’re em8arassed a8out their past identity, to their anti-kin groomer, paired with the most o8vious visual storytelling ever concieved of, and never 8at an eye at it.

I do further clarify exactly why I’m em8arassed with my past actions in this convers8ion. I say I “was always invested as hell in the consequences of everything I did, and how it made me look,” and “how it made me feel a8out myself especially.” The root of the 8ad feelings were never a8out how I would never 8e Mindfang and I was in endless pursuit of nothingness, like some of the fandom seems to insist. It’s very clearly moreso a8out my self perception, and wanting to prove myself.

I also 8ring up what’s actually a pretty 8ig theme in, for lack of a 8etter term, more advanced ancestorkin discussions.¹⁷ “Do I go around thinking I’m smarter than I used to 8e, 8ut end up repeating all the same old patterns without even realizing it?” Repeating cycles are at the core of what makes up a lot of ancestorkin sym8olism, 8ecause continuing the cycle is exactly what I chose to do in an effort to feel valid. Pursuing Tavros was continuing the cycle of d8ing 8ronze losers. Pursuing Kanaya was continuing the cycle of having weird flings with jade8loods. Terezi and I’s rel8ionship pro8a8ly exemplifies this 8etter than any other, though, since we’re 8oth ancestorkin. This quote, in itself, is extremely meta: I’m yet again thinking myself to 8e a8ove my groomer’s influence (whether the malice of it is disguised or not) while 8eing firmly in their grasp, just like with Doc Scratch.

The reason Meenah chose my post-retcon self over my pre-retcon self is, largely, 8ecause I still had a sem8lance of personal identity. She had yet to groom me out of 8eing ancestorkin, so I was a little 8it more of a functional person with less fragile self esteem. The fandom, of course, often percieves this fragility and mental health struggle to 8e somehow 8etter than 8efore, just 8ecause I’m less mean and antagonistic, so I’m functionally 8eing rewarded for repressing my ancestorkinity, just 8y the fandom and not the narrative itself. The line 8etween those two things tends to 8e very thin when you’re fictionkin.

The Idea of Corruption

After my 8r8kup with Meenah, not much happens in rel8ion to ancestorkin until post-canon. 8ut I’m ancestorkin on 8oth sides of the scratch. I actually think this is 8eautifully representative of two of the most common personal mythologies fictionkind¹⁸ tend to have — 8elieving oneself to 8e a fictional character in a past life, or an altern8 universe. On Alternia, my ancestorkinity mirrors the former, and on 8eforus my ancestorkinity mirrors the latter. These are o8viously not the only two ways fictionkind think a8out our identities, 8ut they’re common enough that I think having two versions of me to represent 8oth works out gr8.

8ecause of the nature of me wanting to channel my post-scratch self, rather than growing up with my old journal, my 8eforan self experiences a sort of inverse change to my Alternian self. I was finding my identity, and 8ecoming a little 8it desper8 in the process. The way that this is presented in the fandom, and to some extent, in-text mirrors transpho8ia to an eerie extent. I 8elieve this to 8e a result of people understanding transpho8ic talking points to 8e wrong when they’re directed at trans people, 8ut not doing the work to understand why they’re harmful, and in turn seeing fictionkind as an accepta8le target of these ideas.

My ‘corruption” into Mindfang 8egins with me changing my clothes. On it’s own this wouldn’t 8e unexpected, 8ut then I also tell Meenah that “I would appreci8 it if [she] referred to me as Mindfang.” Soon after, I descend into an episode of madness and kill a 8unch of people. The concept that changing your clothes and name is in any way a ‘g8way drug’ to violence is o8viously transpho8ic, 8ut when it’s 8eing applied to a fictionkin analogy rather than a trans one, people are less likely to register that the line of thinking is 8eing used at all.

This line of thinking is a common one 8etween transpho8es and alterhumisics. Fictionkind are often questioned for 8eing in proximity to their identities. Some are likened to criminals like Randy Stair, with implic8ions that they will end up like him if they continue expressing themselves. In the height of Tum8lr’s KFF era, there were plenty of psy-ops and troll accounts designed to make fictionkin look as deranged as possi8le. One of these hoaxes involved a “Nagito kinnie” cutting their finger off to prove themself as the real character, with a faked audio clip as proof. This was then shared around as if it was real, with ridiculous amounts of people citing it as the reason why they refuse to support or valid8 fictionkin. In fact, I’ve collected a few comments from a questiona8le video (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8VagGzRBFLs) on the topic:

“Ah kins. I had a Homestuck kinnie as a friend once. Honestly, she was chill af. However that also made her a target. Some other batshit insane kinnie went after her because she was the same character and “there could only be one.” It got so bad that my friend had a mental breakdown. Didn’t help that my friend was bullied irl too and we were all idiot children.”

“This is why I highly dislike kins.”

“As much as I love Danganronpa, the fandom’s “kinnies” is an absolute mess. They’ll do anything to be like the character they are supposedly “kinned” to.”

“It’s OK if you want to be like your favorite character, just don’t harm yourself in the process. Also don’t cut off your finger.”

All of these commenters — and more, you can scroll through the comments yourself and see — clearly think fictionkin are at least in some way more prone to violence. It’s also unclear whether or not they’re referring to KFF or using the original definition of fictionkin, or if such a difference even exists in their minds. There’s no way of knowing what these people define kin to mean 8ecause of the way the word has 8een misused. All that’s evident is that they think we’re “8atshit insane,” an “a8solute mess,” and that they highly dislike us.

The idea that fictionkin will do anything to 8e seen as our “kins” — really, ourselves — is extremely prevalent. And in a way, it is true. 8oth in source and outside of it, I’ve done a lot of things I regret in an effort to feel valid. 8ut I was not met with any sort of sympathy or understanding for it, and I can’t say I know anyone else who has either. I was instead fed the same rhetoric found in these comments, with people claiming me to 8e “taking it too far.” The kindest thing I have ever 8een told 8y a non-fictionkin in rel8ion to my maladaptive 8ehaviors is “seek help,” which is typically facetious or at the very least steeped in sanist undertones.

The truth is? I did seek help! I told my therapist I’m fictionkin after over a year of 8eing in the closet a8out it, and with the way internet strangers who claim they know everything a8out psychiatry talk, you’d think I got shipped off to a mental hospital nigh-instantaneously. I asked her if I was delusional, and she laughed at me. It was such a foreign concept to her. The picture of fictionkin that anti-kin folk paint is not rooted in any understanding of psychiatry or concern for other people’s mental health, it’s just a cope they put together to avoid respecting other people. I did not show any psychotic symptoms, 8ecause thinking you’re a fictional character alone is not a symptom of psychosis. Neither is experiencing species dysphoria, or wanting to take steps to transition. Not even taking more risky or ta8oo steps. I started wearing an eyepatch in the summer of 2024, with the support of that same therapist,¹⁹ and the people questioning me for it weren’t professionals or family mem8ers, they were random assholes on the internet with therapy ‘licenses’ that only exist in their head.

I 8elieve that this exists in part 8ecause of the perception of fictionfolk that our identities are unserious or accessories to a deeper, “true” identity. 8ecause so many people think the idea of fictionkin is too ridiculous to 8e real, or they’ve 8een told that it means simply liking or rel8ing to a character, wanting to take up the “8ad parts” of such an identity is seen as having an inherent 8reak from reality; the reality that they’ve made up for themselves. On the other hand, some fictionkin are forced to distance themselves from their identities for fear of 8eing harassed. This was more prevalant in the l8 2010s, 8ut there are still people who this day who will harass and suicide 88 people who identify as characters they deem to 8e pro8lematic. The fictionkin represent8ion in Homestuck does end up exploring this, 8ecause the identity I take up is definitely that of very questiona8le morality.

There are a couple different examples of me em8odying the carciature many anti-kin people have formed: that of a crazed individual who will do a8solutely anything to 8e seen as the “character they kin.” For one, there’s my assault of Tavros, 8ut perhaps even clearer is the scene where I almost kiss Jake. I do end up respecting him and not going through with it, 8ut even the “healing” of him that follows could 8e seen as a sort of metaphorical assault. In 8oth of these scenarios, it’s played like I’m — to quote myself again — “another stupid kid trying to fill the 8oots of a legendary pir8 queen” (in fact, this quote is in a way directly referencing 8oth situ8ions). In the Homestuck 8ooks, Hussie provides this as commentary on the Tavros incident, literally in reference to me choosing not to rape them: “…seeing differences in the ways she wants to be like Mindfang, but can’t quite bring herself to be, might actually tell us more about Vriska than how she strives to be similar.”

I think what they were trying to get at with that is that deep down, 8eneath the surface, I’m actually not as 8ad as Mindfang and I’m merely just a poor corrupted soul taken victim 8y 8ad influence. Of course, if this was true, it would 8e horri8le fictionkin represent8ion, and I refuse to 8e the victim of the 8ad influence of Andrew’s misconceptions on a group they pro8a8ly didn’t even know existed yet. I think this perspective is pretty o8vious in terms of my interactions with Jake, too. I tell him “My advances were inappropri8te, and in the future I will try to 8e more respectful” in what can 8est 8e descri8ed as therapyspeak. It’s the juxtaposition of the identity I’m taking on compared to what I’m willing to do that comes across as a mockery. It comes across like “you can’t 8e Mindfang, 8ecause you aren’t willing to 8e a rapist like she was,” which is exactly the line of thinking that leads to maladaptive 8ehaviors from fictionkin in the first place.

The self-mutil8ion aspect with the Nagito hoax is also present in Homestuck, funnily enough. I tell Dirk he’s “missing a golden opportunity to sever my arm while I’m preoccupied with overconfident 8lather” and further clarify that “It would 8ring me that much closer to following in the footsteps of my true self.” This, paired with the Jake scene, paints a dissonant picture. Am I supposed to 8e a deranged violent lunatic willing to do anything to 8e seen as myself, or a reluctant (F)LARPer that doesn’t measure up to the person I’m trying to copy? The only reasona8le explan8ion is that it’s neither. I am Mindfang, and I do a lot of fucked up and questiona8le things 8ecause of the potentiality for that to 8e refuted.

Eventually, the retcon happens and my 8eforan self is never seen ever again. This is another chain in the pattern of the narratives distaste for fictionkin: the version of me that’s currently 8eing groomed 8y Meenah, who again, is alterhumisic, gets to live and maintain relevance, while the one who tried transitioning to an identity I felt comforta8le in is cursed to nonexistance.

Two acronyms: HS8C and KFF

Homestuck: 8eyond Canon is actually what got me thinking a8out this whole idea in the first place. I had already considered my fictionkinity to 8e canon, and recontextualized some of the content of Homestuck through that lens in my head, 8ut it was only after rereading Homestuck and deciding to read HS8C that I realized just how deep it goes, and how supported my reading actually is 8y the text.

The page 666 visual novel is o8viously meant to represent therapy. The same therapy that I have 8een erroneously told will somehow cure — or at least seek to cure — my fictionkinity the entire time I’ve identified as such. As my anecdotes prove, any good professional²⁰ won’t ever actually try to therapize someone out of 8eing fictionkin and even if they did it wouldn’t do anything 8ut harm the patient. 8ut the ficticious therapy in HS8C is just that, ficticious.

I have to confront an amalgam8 construct of two people who have caused me impersonal and indirect harm: my ancestor, and my lusus. Of course, it’s in reality quite questiona8le that my ancestor caused me any harm, 8ut that’s the main line linking the two entities together. Most of the 8aggage in this scene is associ8ed with Spidermom, 8ut it is also meant to 8e a more explicit end to my “kinning era” as repressed fictionkin tend to call it, once and for all this time. I 8eg Momfang to “L8T ME 8E MY OWN F8CKING PERSON, F8R ONCE” and make it as clear as possi8le that I’m out of my em8arassing old phase. I even have a FRAF signup easter egg that reads “Ugh. This name just feels lame as fuuuuuuuuck to me now. Keep it!” when you type in Mindfang. It would seem that, for all intents and purposes, I want nothing to do with 8eing Mindfang.

8ut then I reach Hell Tier, and the design for it matches a8solutely none of that. I have my Ancestral Awakening sword, and pir8ey 8oots and sleeves, not to mention the sash I wear in my Flarp outfit. I’m speaking the visual language of my ancestor without claiming it as an identity. I’m a fucking kinnie.

This is, for the most part, exactly how most KFF present on the internet, regardless of if they’re the kind that hold targeted malice towards fictionkin. They’ll have a character’s name as their screen name, or even a real one. They’ll use a character’s image in their profile picture, or even cosplay them in real life. They’ll use language that would otherwise indic8 fictionkinity, saying they “kin the character.” 8ut when it comes to any serious identific8ion? A8solutely none. Even if the character has deeply impacted their identity in certain ways — may8e the character helped them process their gender feelings, or was a childhood favor8 — any serious suggestion or implic8ion that they might actually 8e the character will earn mocking remarks, typically ones directed at the “weird kinnies” they’re 8eing accused of 8eing rather than the individual themself.

Yet again, Homestuck is hoisting up a version of me that a8andons my identity and past. In 8eyond Canon, I 8ecome exactly the archetype of person I encounter on the regular: a jaded, “former” fictionkin that flaunts and 8rags how distanced they are from what may or may not 8e their identity.

8ut what does this actually mean? Homestuck perfectly paralleled the experiences of an underrepresented group on accident, and did it in all the wrong ways — should this impact anything, and how? It’s up to you.²¹ 8ut I think it’s a lot wider than that. Don’t 8ase your activism and compassion on a checklist of la8els to support and talking points to counter. 8ase it on core values of kindness. Most of the time, we aren’t making it okay to 8e weird, we’re just expanding the definition of normal. 8ut there will always 8e something outside of normal, and there’s only so much you can expand. Let people tell their stories and live their truths, and let it 8e weird. Also, may8e stop calling yourself a kinnie. For my sake. 💙

8y yours truly, Vriska Aranea Serket, the Marqui(c)e Spinneret Mindfang. They/them.

¹Alterhumisia is defined as “the h8red of or discrimin8ion against alterhumans.”

² Anti-kin is shorter terminology for alterhumisia, 8ut also implies a more direct/targeted attack rather than just accidentally saying something offensive: it’s 8eing alterhumisic as more of a position in discourse or a la8el.

³ I am just as 8ummed a8out having to write a8out him as you are having to read a8out him. Sorry! Also, I acknowledge the irony of continuing to use the word alterhuman when he is humankin.

⁴ Otherkin is sometimes used as an um8rella term for all alterhumans that identify as a different species, and sometimes used more specifically to refer to identific8ion with mythological creatures like elves and dragons.

⁵ Fictionkin refers to otherkin that identify as fictional characters or species, 8ut is typically applied exclusively to more modern media rather than pervasive myths and cultural ideals in the way otherkin is.

⁶MEENAH: i heard a rumor you think youre a human now

MEENAH: that true

CRONUS: its a privwate matter. i dont see vwhy i should havwe to talk about it vwith you, and open myself up to more of your judgmental scorn.

MEENAH: sounds like another desperate cry for attention imo

⁷ Please do not start syscourse over my Homestuck essay, 8ut if you did, it would 8e a8solutely fucking hilarious and I would screenshot all your 8ullshit and show everyone I know. 8ut like. Don’t.

⁸ I’m Vriska Serket, 8y the way. 8th footnote!

⁹ Etymology for the word kinnie is extremely hard to pinpoint, so I’ve never 8een a8le to actually verify this, 8ut it’s worth mentioning that most people cite kinnie as 8eing derived from “tranny.”

¹⁰ Non-alterhumans: not necessarily the 8est term, though, since plenty of the people partaking in this are therian or otherkin and a lot of the experiences KFF descri8e actually fall under fictionhearted/fictionlink/synpath/constel/any num8er of la8els the alterhuman community has cre8ed.

¹¹ I refer to myself exclusively with first-person and reject any la8els like 8eing a “Vriska fictionkin.” I am still fictionkin, 8ut I use that to descri8e my rel8ionship with fiction as a whole rather than my rel8ionship to my own self. This is pretty unconventional and I hope to change that 8y 8eing as loud and annoying a8out it as possi8le, 8ecause there’s no reason except alterhumisia for it to 8e frowned upon in the first place!

¹² 8roader term than fictionkin: encompasses fictionkin, fictives, fictionhearted, fictionlink, etc. Any identity involving fictionkin.

¹³ I 8elieve that most of the time this is out of ignorance, 8ut there has 8een one instance where I 8rought it up and someone was like… “8ut that’s factkin, not fictionkin.” Media literacy is dead, guys. They don’t know what an analogy is anymore. They don’t know what a metaphor or parallel is. We are cooked.

¹⁴ They certainly don’t.

¹⁵ It’s not implied that I use the past-life model for my identity in Homestuck itself, 8ut I know that’s what it is, so… I’m trying to keep this mostly to source knowledge only 8ut I can’t help 8ut slip in little tid8its of things I know to 8e true.

¹⁶ The trans suicide r8 analogy continues to 8e true here.

¹⁷ Acknowledging ancestorkin and factoring it in to analysis really makes Homestuck a 8illion times cooler. The reverse killings? The reverse disa8ilities on 8eforus? A8solutely toe curling and gut wrenching. In this life, I was 8orn in human Li8ra season and they were 8orn in human Scorpio season. :::)

¹⁸ The full suffix of -kin is actually -kind, although it doesn’t get used as much. I think it’s a neater plural form than “fictionkins.”

¹⁹ My optometrists have confirmed it isn’t causing any damage to my vision either, 8ut that’s completely 8esides the point.

²⁰ I want to simultaneously recognize that anti-kin sentiments aren’t 8ased in any actual psychiatric school of thought, 8ut also acknowledge that a lot of the time psychiatric schools of thought in themself can 8e deeply flawed. We live in a sanist world and a lot of the psychiatric system does reflect this.

²¹ 8ut also, I would like it a lot if people depicted me 8eing happy and living my life as Mindfang more often, and Terezi 8eing happy and living their life as Redglare. And also killed Meenah Peixes.