those of you familiar with my hallucinations will know that since around jadetok i've been of the opinion that something is fishy with meat jade. for this post i will be exclusively focusing on her mysterious absence from delfi's the beyond anon's webcomic beyond canon. in the public facing patreon commentary, jade is one of the only characters not present in the list of character designs. her design also did not appear at nycstuck's live drawings. in today's upd8, jade was also one of the only major characters not to appear aside from kanaya, who we know has a design in beyond canon.
notably, dave shows up with a ball and chain attached. he falls over and hits his head on it after losing karkat, and he dies. shortly after, davebot appears, with four balls and chains attached.
"the ol' ball and chain" is old negative slang for a wife, especially one that "holds back" their spouse. rose uses it in Rose: Ramble. why would davebot, accessing his ultimate self, have 4 entire balls and chains...?
presenting:
jade is dave's balls theory.
the sequence of events with the ball is pretty close to what happens with candy dave, and it'd make sense that davebot would be held down even further by the daves' relationships with jade in multiple timelines. davebot is the one most weighed down by pretending to be straight, after all
we know jade is probably asleep again right now because of alt callie, so maybe she's asleep inside the ball(s). most of the solid black shapes are drawn this way but the scribbles even make them look like outer space with stars! who knows. what do you all think. is jade balls?
edit: i wanna make it clear that i think jade is balls in dave's and del'fi's perceptions. i do not actually think jade has been a real ball and chain to any dave because that's bullshit. i like jade
