Fruity Rumpus Asshole Factory

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John’s recent vision from page 719 is incredibly interesting, and I think I've got a very solid theory about what it all means.

Between the weird undulating light that turns into Vriska’s smile, there are three scenes that appear.

1: A pumpkin that is actually a cake, along with the knife used to cut into it.

2: The table in a white void, with an empty chair.

3: June Egbert on a stage. Or maybe those are Act curtains?

The elephant in the room here: who is this June? I've seen a lot of people assuming that this is Candy!June who John is going to become within the Plot Point. However, I have an alternate theory. I don’t think the silhouette is Candy!June, I think it’s Meat!June, and I might have an idea of where she is.

Lord English's narrative poison seemingly forced Meat!John out of Homestuck proper. His friends are barely thinking about him, nobody but Terezi seems to care all that much that he's gone, and nobody even bothered to check his house, where the letters he left behind sat unopened.

So, where do you go when you're forced outside of the narrative? Picture Homestuck as a world riding on the back of a turtle. Now picture turtles all the way down, narratives standing on the shoulders of the ones that came before them. Where would you go if you were pushed off of your own narrative? To the next layer down, of course.

I think Meat!June is in Problem Sleuth. Let me show you why!

A picture from Homestuck Beyond Canon page 719 of a pumpkin that is also a cake, with a slice cut out of it.

Here is the pumpkin from the vision on page 719. It's also a gender reveal cake, which is funny, but the pumpkin itself is most important here.

The standard pumpkin model from Homestuck. It has very bright colors and looks different from the one on page 719

Here is the standard pumpkin model used in Homestuck. Pretty different! But...

The pumpkin model from Problem Sleuth. It is the same one used on page 719.

Here is the schema pumpkin model from Problem Sleuth. Look familiar? It doesn't stop there!

The table with an empty chair from page 719.

Here is the chair from page 719.

The afterlife from Problem Sleuth. It's the same table from the vision.

Here's the afterlife from Problem Sleuth. Sensing a pattern here!

So, let's say Meat!John ended up in Problem Sleuth somehow. What is it about this silly and noirish world that would force some cold, hard self-reflection?

The characters from Problem Sleuth and John next to their respective female alter egos. John looks a little freaked out.

Meeting your imaginary female alter ego will do that to you. Hey John, feeling normal about this?

...

He's fine.

These curtains might not be Act curtains after all! You know what was all the rage in the 1920s? Vaudeville comedians. You know, like Poppop Crocker from the Alpha timeline. Also, this is unrelated but I literally JUST noticed that her coattails look like a handlebar mustache. How silly!

So yeah, that's my theory about June! I'd love to hear other people's responses and interpretations of their own. So, SO excited for her to finally make an appearance!!!

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Serenity

serenity

- she/her

Pronouns:	she/her

Saturday, September 6th, 2025, 9:19 PM — 12 days ago

Pronouns:	working on it
Age:	16 years

Pronouns:	he/they
Age:	22 years

Pronouns:	they/them
Age:	23 years

Pronouns:	she/they
Age:	27 years

I have a theory... a JUNE theory!!