i think the first thing for me was seeing ruby from steven universe, thinking she was a boy, finding out she wasn't, and then thinking that the concept of "girl who looks like a boy" was SO COOL. i was also very into the idea of "genderbent" characters, my first exposure to that probably being the fionna and cake episodes of adventure time. marshall lee did things to my little brain lol

the thing that really pushed me over the edge in realizing i was a boy, though, was my chemical romance. lmao. it was seventh grade, so i was starting puberty and reeeaaally starting to hate my body for reasons i couldn't parse, and definitely wanted to look like the members (especially gerard). also, there were just a lot of trans mcr fans online who helped me out <3

psycholonials for sure helped me be more comfortable with not being a super binary trans guy. it took a while for me to get comfortable dressing femininely (by which i mean, i JUST did) and i think psycholonials played a part in that (as well as. yknow. having friends who support me and being more confident because of that.)

oh my god i just remembered. when i was in i think third grade i came up with this story about a "prince" and princess who were betrothed to each other, but both hated the idea of ruling and decided to run away together and just be besties. but the "prince" was actually a trans woman (and this was important to her lore) even though at that age i don't think i even knew what being transgender was? if that's not hilarious foreshadowing i don't know what is.